The situation is under investigation, but until ecologists can put together a full report, employees and visitors are advised to avoid all wild animals in the canine family, particularly ones that:
1. Seem to be larger than a typical coyote, with a squared muzzle and shorter, rounded ears.
2. Howl instead of yip or yelp.
3. Seem to appear out of nowhere after a cloud shifts, revealing a full moon.
4. Seem to be wearing ripped clothing or even glasses.
5. Walk on hind legs.
6. Bear a strange resemblance to a neighbor or coworker.
Remember: You are our eyes and ears on the site. Please report all incidents to Fermilab ecology, and, in the event of an encounter with such a creature, please note the timing on a lunar calendar and visit Fermilab medical during daylight hours.