ICARUS experimental hall temporarily locked

ICARUS passive-aggressively voices his angst. Photo: Artemis

ICARUS passive-aggressively voices his angst. Photo: Artemis

Fermilab researchers may find themselves temporarily waylaid when trying to access the ICARUS experiment. ICARUS’s father, Daedalus, showed up earlier this week, and his tweenage son has not responded well.

“Stop smothering me, Dad,” the detector cried, locking all the entrances to his room. “First I hid in an underground cave so you wouldn’t find me. Then I tried to make new friends at CERN. I just want to explore the universe.”

“No son of mine is going to be a neutrino detector,” Daedalus shouted through the door. “Stop being so arrogant! Come help me build mazes again! It’s the family business!”

“I don’t like this new crowd you’re hanging out with. I was right about the whole flying too close to the sun thing,” Daedalus added, “and I’m right about this.”

“I never even liked flying,” ICARUS responded. “I just wanted to take a boat. Anyway I’ve got this whole liquid argon thing going now… I’m doing fine. You could never understand! I’m a detector now! What are you, Dad? You’re just a myth! Like faster-than-light neutrinos!” ICARUS said. “Don’t make me go to Brookhaven! Because I will – and I’ll take the g-2 magnet with me! We’re in love. I put a promise ring on it!”

The spat was ongoing at last check. We will update this post when ICARUS and Daedalus reach an agreement and the hall is reopened.

“Which better be by dinner, young man,” Daedalus threatened.