From NASA, Oct. 27, 2016: Astronomers using observations from NASA’s Kepler and Swift missions have discovered a batch of rapidly spinning stars that produce X-rays at more than 100 times the peak levels ever seen from the sun. The stars, which spin so fast they’ve been squashed into pumpkin-like shapes, are thought to be the result of close binary systems where two sun-like stars merge.

The pub will have special hours on Monday, October 31, to test out new menu items. Drop by between 4 p.m. and 10 p.m. and sample: Appetizers: Pickled ladyfingers Caramel corn on the cob Main courses: Raven tacos with jack-o’-lantern cheese Boiled spider crab with extra spider Dessert: Full moon pie Bat Battenberg cake

The dead made themselves very visible late last night, setting up camp in front of Wilson Hall, which menacingly enough, is either there (hidden by threatening clouds) or not there (and allowing us to think it is hidden by threatening clouds). The Hyperbolic Obelisk appears grateful to be camouflaged by its similarly shaped neighbors. It will not be harmed.

We’re not sure where it came from, but there’s 600 pounds of assorted candy in the IARC parking lot. It’s all unwrapped and omits a slightly dubious odor, but Mother always said sugar doesn’t go bad. So go nuts! Please keep dogs away from the chocolate.

Are you a fan of black cats and pointy hats? Is your cauldron almost always filled with brew? Does your face have a greenish tinge that you can’t explain? If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions, witchcraft might be in your future. Stop by the Witch Recruitment table in Wilson Hall today between 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. to talk with a guild-certified witch and pick up complimentary pamphlets and potions.

Tevatron reanimated

Scientists hoped that bringing the Tevatron back to life would yield more insights into the nature of space, time and reality. What they got instead was a ring hoping to set a world record beyond the bounds of physics.

Chasing a dream From stream to stream, Following every vector, A coyote went With ardent bent In search of El Dark Sector. For matter dark, For some small spark, In various detectors, He scanned and sought. Yet he saw naught That looked like El Dark Sector. “Dark energy — I hear its plea To prove it’s no mere specter!” He feared he’d fail. ‘Twas his white whale: This land of El Dark Sector. His wounds he nursed. “To see it…